TBH: I'm actually typing this at 10:00 am. I thought (more or less) through what I wanted post when I was up at 4:00, but the phone was in the living room and I would have had to leave the duvet cocoon to access it or the desktop mac. So I mentally dictated to myself until I fell asleep.
So don't say I didn't warn you when there's no neat ending to this.
I slept surprisingly well. Almost . . . suspiciously so. The nasal waterfall just turned off when I laid down. Unexpected to say the least. I woke a bit before 4:00 am, but it was just my usual why-sleep-through-the-night? thing, not a desperate choking because all breathing options were full of snot.
I tried to fall asleep again before my bladder could interfere because then my brain would join in and I'd lose the rest of the night and I still had over three hours before the alarm dammit! assuming I was even going to work because honestly I couldn't decide if I was sick/contagious and should stay home or not.
I replayed the guided meditation for deep sleep that had knocked me out only two minutes in (but then I was jarred awake by a very jingly Christmas ad after). The wee demon does not like the phone talking in bed. I don't understand her beef and she won't explain. She can be so cat at times. The meditation was nice but didn't work like it had the first time. And my bladder had caught on by the end.
And then my brain woke up, too, and proved, once again, why mindfulness and meditation and even cbd gummies can only do so much when my brain grabs me onto a random thought and runs.
The whole how-watery-are-various-bits-of-a-human-body research didn't invade my dreams. As far as I know. I could understand if it had. I guess my brain got bored with something so straightforward.
All day yesterday and when I woke up in the night I was aware, on some level, of the tickle. You know. That annoying sensation inside your nose when you're about to sneeze. I felt it all frickin' day. I really think it's the reason I keep pouring out this nose water. If whatever it is would quit irritating my nose then this would all just stop.
I tried to play devil's advocate with my brain and suggest the nasal tickle is caused by the constant runoff, not the other way around. My brain flat out rejected this.
The very first nose-blow yesterday morning was in the bathroom. I did look into the tp I'd used and I know that's weird and gross but I have a lifetime of allergy-induced sinus infections so it's a habit tho I don't do it in public. Usually. Anyway, I looked. It was the clear watery discharge you're all sick of reading about. (Sorry.) But, it initially looked, as I spread apart the folds, almost web-like. "How can a liquid look like a web?" you ask. I can't explain. It just did.
I wrote it off as an affect of using tp to blow my nose.
Or thought I'd written it off.
Trigger warning. Stop reading now if you're squeamish especially about things in orifices or insects or just really weird random late-night thoughts.
Twenty-ish hours later, I understood that my brain had actually held on to the web notion. And smugly announced, picture Poirot with the assembled suspects in a drawing room, that I had a spider, or more likely a spider's egg sac in my nose. Which is what's putting pressure on a nasal nerve or two and causing my nose to try to flush it out, possibly with excess brain water. My brain is not entirely clear on that last bit, possibly from loss of water.
In the end I decided to stay home today. I'm clearly sick, altho I'm not sure that what's wrong with me is contagious.
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