Does everyone else have this much drama doing yard work? Or it really just me?

I’ve been patching up the lawn mower bag for a couple of years. It’s a Sears brand, so it’s not like I can just go on the store site for a replacement. Also I bought this mower in March 2002, possibly 2001, so it seems stupid to buy anything new for it. I finally stopped even fooling with the bag middle of last summer.

My brother took all of our mowers to a special UK Agri-Engineering lawn mower service thing they do. Oil change, new spark plug, sharpen and balance the blades. Seriously clean the blades so they can be sharpened in my case. That was end of Feb maybe? I’m pretty sure streets were still icy in places when I took it to my brother’s house so he could drive all three mowers to wherever on campus. He brought it back a week late and it’s been in my basement ever since.

Today I maneuvered it, with much back and forth and getting hung up on the fire pit base and more back and forth and finally out of the basement. I checked the gas tank. I got the gas can and filled up the mower. I attempted to start it. I put it in time out for being stubborn. I brought the dead ferns to the back. I rested. I finally started the mower. I mowed. I had to take a break because my mower muscles definitely atrophied over the winter. I mowed. Over halfway done I thought “wow, the mower is a lot quieter.” Then I wondered if it really was or if it’s just because my head is so clogged. Thanks, spring n Kentucky. Which led to thoughts of pollen. I realized the bagless mower wasn’t spewing loose cuttings back at me because there is a bag on the mower!

Twenty minutes of activity all focused on the mower and I didn’t notice this bag. The bag is what kept getting in the way with the fire put base.

I didn’t bother to send the taped, glued, and sewn together bag with the mower to the engineering clinic because why bother? So maybe the students thought they’d misplaced my bag? And put a generic one of about the right size on? Which is fab! New bag!

The bag is full of fresh thick new spring grass (and weeds). I can’t get the f#cker off the mower. It’s mostly the right size, but not quite. So next time my brother is here I have to ask him to get the bag off — and then remember to never ever use it again.

Maybe he can give it back to the engineering students. Because thanks, y’all, but really, no.

p.s. I was Productive today. Capital P. I even changed the furnace filter. Without a panic attack or crying in frustration. Only a little light cursing of the hvac guys who installed it and didn’t take me seriously when I asked them to show me, step by step, how to do it. Jerks. Annnnd I only had to take it all apart and start over once.

p.p.s. I need to get back into journaling. I know how helpful it is. So that’s why I’m back even if no one ever reads this.