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I’m feeling, oh what’s it called, the opposite of dread and despair

czarinamisha

I started today with a plan of action for the day. Nothing fancy. But an actual honest-to-God plan. It evolved somewhat from the original idea.


At 5:30am: Go back to sleep. Go to the grocery the next time I wake up. Free time to read, do crosswords, sew, and watch Sandman. Dinner (Cuban food truck) and berry hard cider at Liquor Barn.


At 6:50am: F#ck groceries. Go back to sleep. Order pizza delivery and snack all day. Free time to read, do crosswords, sew, and watch Sandman. Berry hard cider at Liquor Barn (skip the Cuban cuisine because all-day at-home pizza buffet).


At 9:40am: Demon’s squeaking seeps into my dream. Ok, this as rested as I’m gonna get. Get up. Med, shower, brush teeth, breakfast. Coffee! Free day for yadda yadda. Pizza grazing all day, or basic lunch + Cuban dinner? It’s a tough decision. Both? Today is payday and I’m feelin’ rich because it’s the first time in six years I don’t have a car payment. Berry hard cider, then groceries because there’s a Kroger behind Liquor Barn.


At 9:43am: Major charley horse when I tried to get up. Much swearing from me and dirty looks from the cat. Finally upright and pacing to work out muscle kink. So where was I? Food truck menu looks delish and I’ve never had Cuban cuisine. hmmmm. Pizza grazing all day or basic lunch + Cuban dinner? It’s a tough decision. Both? Pay bills and plan spending until next payday. So, ok, not pizza and Cuban. I’m not really rich. Berry hard cider, then groceries because there’s a Kroger behind Liquor Barn.


At 11:12am: Back on track. I still need to make a decision on the pizza vs empanadas issue. But I’m up to the coffee and free day point. I have time. I’m def doing the berry hard cider event followed by grocery shopping this evening.


So almost noon and this where I am:

clean but back in a nightgown

sitting on the couch instead of lying in bed

farty because I took my morning med

no doctor appointments or car maintenance scheduled

books to read, projects to work on

not solvent enough to buy whatever I want but better off than a month ago because one less regular draining my account


Could this be what a good day looks like?


p.s. Back yard burial mound update:

There is no update.


Still just a big ol’ hump of dirt surrounded by a lot more dirt with deep tire ruts leading visitors to the dirt. But I’m dealing with it pretty calmly and like a grownup. I texted “local sewer guy” after work again. (I didn’t claim to be a reasonable grownup.) That’s one call and two texts in ten days. At some point Howard will either finish effing up my yard or realize it’s less trouble to just keep me informed.


UPDATE

At 6:49pm: I almost made it out the door. Really. Changed clothes, put on makeup. I even got on das Boot. Annnnnnd sat there. I don’t know what stopped me. What’s still stopping me. My stomach was a little extra weird, but seems to have calmed down.


Technically I still have time as the berry hard cider event goes until 9 — altho I don’t know how late the food truck will stay. As long as people want yucca fritas?


I still have my going outside clothes on because I still have to go to the store. As was horribly evident when I trued to make lunch and realized I had nothing but frozen lasagna which takes 90 minutes to bake which meant I didn’t eat until a bit after 3:00 which probably contributed to the unsettled stomach situation.


It had been a good day. I’m not (overly) dreading work tomorrow. Why can’t I make myself go out and try something that might actually he fun?


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