Monday: Plan to have a large salad with what?, what are you going to make for supper? Get home even later than the very late you thought you'd get home. Cook something that comes in a box or bag and just requires you boil water. Fall asleep on the couch. Wake up two hours later. You should make that salad now. Yeah, right. Stumble to bed.
Tuesday: Get home after nine again. You stuffed a wrap in your mouth hours ago. Thanks to the time lapse and the speed with which you ate you aren't 100% sure you did actually eat it. Fall asleep on the couch and wake an hour and a half later. Salad? You really really should. Too tired to do anything fancy, like chop veggies or get a fork, you eat several leaves of lettuce rabbit-style straight from the package. Yay, a vitamin. Maybe even a mineral.
Wednesday: Manage to get home a little after eight. Another supper of bringing two cups of water to a boil, pour in contents of bag or box, cover and simmer for seven minutes. Chop lettuce -- look at you go, Julia Childe -- but stop short of peeling carrots. Serve on a plate. Top with dressing and a hard boiled egg.
Thursday: You get home from work less than twelve hours after you left in the morning. Again. wheee. So much extra time, like maybe thirty or forty minutes, before you fall asleep on the couch. Chop lettuce and peel and julienne carrots while leftovers from last night's bag meal reheats.
Friday: It's your day off! Fast food lunch but you'll have a nice big salad when you finish running errands. Drive north then south then north and south again etcetera etcetera on a road with lots of accidents. Take forced detour around an accident. Get home thirty minutes later than planned. Eat something. Or just fall asleep on the couch as soon as you get home. Whatever.
Saturday: Repeat Friday except it isn't your day off anymore.
And now it's Sunday. Probably. I've been up for maybe six hours but it feels like thirty. I did eat a salad with my cheeseburger and (lame) fries for lunch.
I'm struggling extra right now. I'm having trouble finding reasons to even keep trying. But I know a big part of that spiral is frustration and exhaustion. (My sleep habits this past week were as good as my diet.) So I do keep trying, at least until I fall asleep on the couch.
But I don't want this to be an oh-woe-is-me post. Writing my continuing salad adventure actually helped lift me a bit. Maybe a reminder of who I am under the piles of stress? I hoped you found a little humor in it.
p.s. I know I disappeared for several weeks and I plan to explain where I've been as soon as I figure that out.
p.p.s. These fries really are the worst. They have no flavor and have even nulled the flavor of malt vinegar like some sort of taste black hole.
p.p.p.s. I think it's time for me to fall asleep on the couch. I crossed one thing off of today's to-do list, so I've earned it. I have <checks timer> twenty minutes before the chicken comes out of the slow cooker. Grand.
Comments